Despite my thoughts and prayers, these fears remained. Meanwhile, Sweet Momma and the kids were getting frustrated with the lack of a decision. I think everyone wanted to know - one way or the other - whether we were going to adopt. In September 2008, Sweet Momma asked me to commit to praying intensely for one month on the subject of adoption so that we could make a final decision. A few weeks later, Sweet Momma took the kids to her parents' house - about three hours away - to visit Sweet Momma's grandmother who was in the hospital. I had to work so I was by myself that night. That evening, I went onto YouTube and searched for "Ethiopian Adoption." Several videos popped up and I began to watch some of them. One of the early ones I watched reiterated that Ethiopia has six million orphans, most of whom will not survive to adulthood. The video described their fears but then said "Yes, god, these two will live. That phrase hit me over the head. That was the answer. Yes, I still had fears but knowing that Christ gave his life or us and having the opportunity to partially repay that gift by providing a better life to two of God's children was overwhelming. I stayed up late that night, watching and re-watching videos and sobbing.
And so our journey begins. I don't have all the answers and I know there will be obstacles and mountains to climb. But when you know you are obedient to God, somehow all the fears become less important. I have told family and friends that for me, adopting from Ethiopia is the biggest step of faith since accepting Christ. But it is in the biggest steps of faith in which we see God the most.
Stand Up Dad